sat/20211120

Alarm bells at 0327 thanks to the new CGM low blood sugar alert (I have it set to go off if I hit 85, which, for me, means that it'll probably start crashing; gives me a bit of a buffer zone of awareness to do something about it), ingested a few glucose tablets and laid in bed waiting for something else to happen until 0430 (usual wakeup time) but the only thing that happened was that the CGM decided it was wrong at 0327 and that, oh, nevermind, you were fine. Woke at 193. Currently fighting the quasi-hyper wrought by unecessary glucose tab consumption (didn't have a fingerstick monitor upstairs, so I winged it – oops) but there you go. I've set alarms to go off if I go above 250 - though I have to remember to turn them off at night because I always go above 250 in the middle of the night and come back to earth by breakfast – and it's not like there's anything I can do about those nightmiddle hypers during their reign of error.

Such is the life, the day to day.

Adrift in a period where everything – podcast included – is in the Friction stage; occasional glimmer of Flow, but it remains a period of Frictiony Friction. Going to make a go of connecting MG10XU mixer direct to the iPad via USB -> USB-C cable this morning to see if that solves (part of) the pod woes but I’m not holding my breath. A phrase in Oliver Burkeman’s FOUR THOUSAND WEEKS rings loud: “Stay on the fucking bus.”

The day and the leaves and the in-lawn await (joy of joys).

NO TIME TO DIE

An excellent and emotional – if uneven and at pains to wrap up every single thread – end to Craig's tenure. Third favorite of his films, order being: CASINO ROYALE, SKYFALL, NO TIME TO DIE, QUANTUM OF SOLACE, SPECTRE (QUANTUM has grown in my estimation with each viewing). "We Have All the Time in the World" never fails to reduce me to a weeping puddle – that it was the centerpiece of my favorite Bond film of all time, ON HER MAJESTY'S SECRET SERVICE (no it wouldn't have been better with Connery) makes me even more weepy. James Bond will return.

(Directed by Cary Joji Fukunaga from a script by Neal Purvis, Robert Wade, Cary Joji Fukunaga, and Phobe Waller-Bridge. Starring Daniel Craig, Lea Seydoux, Rami Malek, Lashana Lynch, Ana de Armas, Jeffrey Wright, Ben Winshaw, Naomie Harris, Ralph Fiennes, and Christoph Waltz. Released 08 October 2021.)

Newport: Friction / Flow / Finalization

While on my way to somewhere I really didn't want to go yesterday and, to drown out the noise of my car, I listened to a recent episode of Cal Newport's DEEP QUESTIONS pod, first in awhile, in which he talked about his "Friction / Flow / Finalization" project pathway. (+/-17:41 in the episode)

Basic idea: the first phase, Friction, is the project's nascency , rife with requisite growing pains and the onerous, ponderous getting of nowhere until, at some point or another, you hit a groove and slip into the Flow stage, that wondrous place where the project takes on a life of its own and you get somewhere with it, working its way until its Finalization stage, which is, in many ways, a mirror of the Friction stage, full of similar ponderousness and onerousness – rinse, wash, repeat, for a lifetime.

He also advocates setting different schedules for the different phases, an idea not at all without merit – something I should have considered long ago. Perhaps I have been doing this, in my own way, when I get frustrated and end up only doing half days without knowing why.

But something else this pathway points out: if you're in the habit of continually starting new projects, you end up in the Friction phase far more often than you need to, often never reaching that Flow stage – and certainly not Finalization.

I’m way too deep into too much Friction at the moment; will continue to examine processes through this lens until it – or I – exhausts itself.

fri/20211119

Note to self from this morning's writing block:

"Is the problem that I haven't found the right POV? perspective? ... frame? (or is it simply that i cant fucking write?)"

(Continuing to think about this; might publish something or somesuch on those thoughts later.)

One of those days, one of those days. Anyhow.

Rowing machine fantastic, though I'm not sure that it will - thanks blood sugar/T1D – grant me an off-day from running (it will, however, be an excellent alternative during cold rains and/or impossible winter weather): Running extends my controlled blood sugar for at least 24 hours whereas rowing, while an excellent way to drop the blood sugar, doesn't seem to have as long of a shelf-life. Will try doing both today, perhaps a bit shorter of a run with a shorter period of rowing. Yoga remains a constant, no matter what. I couldn't do the running – or anything – without it.

Working towards an acceptance that I might have, after a year and a half of relentless creative output into the ether of indifference, hit that period of non-creativity. The solution, the pattern, remains the same: do the work.

Kotaro Hoshiyama

in

Adore Hoshiyama’s style of collision and his transformation of boundaries and expectation into a creative fuel. (Insta)

The 42-year old painter counts manga artists like Tezuka Osamu, Katsuhiro Ootomo and Kazuo Umezu as early influences. But he also looked to Picasso, Kurt Schwitters and the collage-based work of the neodadaists and pop artists. Hoshiyama enjoyed diversity and using multiple styles of expression. But he struggled with conventional pressures to choose just one, which many associate with originality. Eventually he had a breakthrough, realizing that the structures in place restricting him could be turned upside down to unleash his creative freedom.