weight bearings

in

(previously...)

28ºF, sunny: I am almost able to breathe through both nostrils and am, for the most part, fully recovered from the last week. Exhausted, but that's nothing new. As a good friend said yesterday, I'm bearing a lot of weight on my shoulders. My shoulders hurt: edging closer and closer to those immortal words, "fuck it": fuck the politics of it all, the caring, the waste of breath, the constant feelings of a life if not unlived than lived on others' terms and wants and needs. None of the weight, the pressure, has been worth it nor will it ever be in the future.

Started re/emergence0006 and found something I enjoy and can have fun with. Weird, all that good stuff: sometimes it's fun just to go into something with no expectations of anything and noodle about until you find something that strikes you and build on that. Temporary break on re/e0006 for next two workblocks to put together tomorrow’s newsletter.

breathing out of one nostril sorta

in

(previously…)

Delightful evening out at restaurant for first time in a year with good friends and delicious large shrimp and rye dulled the edge of the snow-covered rising this morning at 32ºF after yesterday's 70ºF under high winds and texts WRT barn collapse and transitional care (the collapse was much more interesting): my sinuses, they doth protest.

Finished TITANFALL 2 last night: def. recommend. IRON GIANT meets PACIFIC RIM (minus Kaiju) meets RED FACTION. Also finished the second half of MOON KNIGHT's debut and I'm in.

The first chunk of the day's work was one of those one-handed unicorns: a good writing morning. A skeleton emergent / a day awaiting.

voidwind serenade

in

Adrift in that post-release void, uncertain of my next steps except to take one and to do the work and all that stuff. Have to get better at ignoring the silence. Just do my thing and be. Working on it.

High wind warning at 2334 heralded, appropriately, high winds all night long, the open window and aforementioned high winds doing little to make my seasonal allergies made all the more worse by the superhighbounceballness of it all any better but the warning was cancelled not long before I got up and, after some heavy rain that I didn't hear because I was working and listening to good music, the sun is shining and the winds seem to have settled until they decide to unsettle themselves because Ohio. The fence still stands. Victory.

I am fascinated by these 360ºpop-up books.

Halfway through MOON KNIGHT Episode One (long story as to why we only made it halfway). Digging it and no I don't care about his accent. Picking up some Latveria / Doctor Doom vibes from Ethan Hawke and his village even though I know that "mygod this means INSERT MEPHISTO OR OTHER VILLAIN HERE is finally coming to the MCU" is the in thing and I'm definitely wrong anyhow so there.

Eating in a restaurant tonight, first time in almost a year: ever since T1D, I pretty much stopped enjoyed dining out – especially since I can cook most of what I would eat elsewhere at home anyhow; the plague made that decisive lack of enjoyment even more prevalent. Wasn't worth the effort. Good friends do, however, have a way of changing that calculus.

NEW TSR: Wallace Stroby (II)

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Wallace Stroby, author of one of my favorite novels of last year, HEAVEN’S A LIE, returns to TSR to discuss my favorite film of all time, Sergio Leone’s ONCE UPON A TIME IN THE WEST, and all things in its orbit – history, beginnings, endings, duels, landscapes, influences, restraint (or the lack thereof), characters – and Leone himself as well as a broad look at spaghetti westerns (and their heirs apparent), the music of Ennio Morricone, the impact of the film on Wallace's writing, and more. Our full conversation lives here.

i am generating silence

in

Waiting room days are at an end, the patient being in transitional care for the next three weeks, meaning that I can, for 21 days at least, close the eye that's always open just a little bit.

Nearing completion of THE SOCIALIZED RECLUSE’s second return, that return being a conversation with Wallace Stroby on my favorite film of all time, ONCE UPON A TIME IN THE WEST. Silence generation this morning as I still have to solve the high gain requirements of the Scarlett 2i2 picking up every bodily function and movement in the spaces between and sometimes below my words. The ease of recording with it, though, makes it all worthwhile. Again, should wrap that up sometime before lunch and release shortly thereafter. Will update this post accordingly once it's live.

Beware giant goldfish.