Recognizing that the void mentioned yesterday is coming, at least partially, from the reality that – after two+ decades of dreading the holidays – I no longer have to dread them. Can't help but laugh when the texts from the funeral home arrive about grief in the holidays: I don't have grief in their lit candle prayers sense but in the sense of an umooring brought by a freedom from dread and a total lack of a notion of how to navigate the holidays and life in general without said dread. Happy dead turkey day to those who celebrate.