Seems my midlife crisis has manifested in a desire to beat the original SUPER MARIO BROS without using a warp zone by the time I hit 50. I'm 44 now, so I've got a bit of runway. Other than the "no warping" rule, I'm also - since I'm playing it on my little NES mini (pork chop Nintendo, as I fondly call it) in The Shed and with it, the option of saving and walking away - instituting a single-playthrough rule: once I start, I don't stop until I die or win, just like those long evenings of perpetual failure that ended 20 years later with a (warped) victory and subsequent blackout drunken revelry. So, in that spirit, round one: