wed/20220810

67ºF, cloudy: no storms last night, no "tree-related contact" outage / transformer explosion so that was nice... two more PRESS (A)'s assembled - getting more comfortable with the process, +/- an hour for each copy + one envelope rewritten for legibility; three now bound for the mercy of the postal service later this afternoon ... reminded of the Virginia Woolf quote about rhythm especially as I'm in the embryonic stages of the new MainFiction Thing / PRESS (A) 02 – clogged with the ideas and no way to get them out – other than to write them down and hope that the music, their music, will come to me: this is the theory, at least... started the last of Ellroy's first LA Quartet, WHITE JAZZ and, like all Ellroy, it'll take me at least to page 50 to find his rhythm for that particular work (though it's always welcoming to read salacious gossip at the start, on the QT and very hush hush)... would be thrilled if this printer became more than a concept… CHORUS remains excellent though I want to fly like in CRIMSON SKIES and the controls just don't want to cooperate / such is life... the day awaits.

tue/20220809

Stormy last night with a power outage heralded by a flashing and popping transformer from somewhere through the window from 2345 until 0237 (which I know because I distinctly remember checking my phone first when we reported it and then again when it came back on). Lesson of this outage: I've underestimated how essential that fan has become to my sleeping: hated it when I first came to live here and now my brain doesn't shut up without it and my brain says some weird shit when the power goes out and the fan stops running.

"They even broke into my safe!" = this decade's "I am not a crook.'“

mon/20220808

PRESS (A) 01 is in the world (of newsletter subscribers) and I'm 41 and I've already started work on PRESS (A) 02: new Kanban created in Obsidian and a new main page for a phrase that's been in my head for awhile that managed to claw its way to the top of the brainmatter – and push another thing off to the wayside: as I'm a different writer than I was before 01, I'd rather explore this new clawing, see where it leads.

Arrival: I used gift cards to buy Kirby a menagerie of Jolly Balls and now he has eight of them in different sizes (horse-sized and slightly less than horse-sized) to play with in the backyard: may we all be as happy with things as Kirby was with the Jolly Balls; like Sheryl Crow said, it's not about getting what you want but wanting what you've got or something like that:

Why am I thinking of an early aughts Sheryl Crow song?

sun/20220807

(Happy birthday to me. )

While I can't say that it hasn't been a frustrating morning – nigh-incomprehensible sales tax rigamarole can an idea quickly transform – it has been an accomplished one: hitting send on the announcement email was, most definitely a moment of relief and catharsis: her estate – and my memory – is settled.

(I won't say closure because closure is bullshit.)

What I intend for PRESS (A) is that it be my *print-only* home for long-form, thought out works that function as a four-seater sushi restaurant / dive in a subway station dedicated to the exploration of my craft delivered between bent covers held together with binding tape or duct tape if I run out of the former and channeled from brain to reader via my own two hands in a DIY/punk/pulp/underground comix delivery system. Bottom line: whatever I want to do goes: this is MINE.

If nothing else, I feel as though I am where I am – and for the first time in years, I'm good with it. Best birthday gift I could ask for.

thu/20220804

Binding snafus – though my high capacity stapler is marvelous – and a need to let publishing things (the writing part is done) percolate for a couple of days on the final PRESS(A) gauntlet – have brought a most welcome return to fiction for a couple of days. While I can't say that I actually got anywhere in my imagined reality, it was grand to be back there (and to find that something I left to percolate still worked).

Brutal about BATGIRL but I hope this portends Warners getting their shit togther about DC films. Not holding my breath, given that it seems to be more about cutting losses and tax breaks than anything – though the "DC isn't a hobby anymore" line does give me some hope - just a bit, though. OK, not that much.

I get - and appreciate - the idea behind the exhibit, but this wearable baby head will give me nightmares.

wed/20220803

Halfway through line edits on PRESS(01) and the prototype has already fallen apart but that's why I've got a high-capacity stapler and book binding tape coming later today; margins look good, the thing's 80% ready to go. Will probably open up to subscribers on Sunday or middle of next week.

Also later today: dogchildren get their lyme disease vaccine booster shot which means I'll be carrying an 80-pound German Shepherd into the office, and afternoon workout in addition to the five cubic yards of mulch in the driveway waiting to be delivered to their new homes across the backyard.

Mulchmulchmulchmulch…

tue/20220803

Not saying for sure, but I think the text of LAST CHRISTMAS is done. Looks like – though I don't want to jinx it - that the page design and margins are, other than a few minor shifts of a tenth of an inch, likewise. Might be brave enough to try a printing of the whole thing, see how it all comes together. Get ready, little Brother laser printer: you're about to get a workout – and a new, 10000-page capacity toner (so you've got that going for you, which is nice).

A large mulchy delivery inbound at some point this morning: there will be tarps; there will be shoveling; there will be dragging said tarps with said large mulchy delivery... there will not be more trips to understaffed big-box home improvement stores for wasted money and time though I did enjoy the parking lot time to read The Economist on the Kindle (much more pleasant than the iPad).

Finished the Helter Skelter in POWERWASH SIMULATOR and have moved on to the private jet owned by the guy with the gigantic mining drill. As much as I love the power washing - excuse me, pressure washing, as the firefighters so helpfully pointed out – I love the text messages from my clients that pop up on the 10%s. The little burg of Muckington is a living, breathing satire on Americans by a team of Brits and I love it - Kevin Bernard's helpful scoring of my washing technique and advice for improvement during the Helter Skelter clearing reminds me of chainsawing a tree at my grandfather's. Oh, and don't mine near those monks: they've got eggs.

mon/20220801

Still figuring the morning timing. Getting there.

I've been staring at the Sanctum for most of the weekend with a desire to make it smaller, to relegate my mind to one back corner and stuff it full of desk and books and weird ephemera – not that it isn’t already – but what I'm talking about here is a deeper consolidation: that which is spread over two chunks of the paint shop shall be jammed into one (minus the couch – though dogchildren might object).

It’s a desire that creeps up every so often and eventually diminishes when I decide that there's no way to pull it off but what can I say hope springs eternal/infernal: my desire to work in something essentially the size of an antique mall booth is nothing if not consistent.

Started playing CHORUS last night – yes, I needed a break from POWERWASH SIMULATOR (the Helter Skelter ride is exhausting) – and I was more than a little thrilled to find that CHORUS is essentially a full-on, souped-up, and absolutely stunning space version of one of my favorite games of all time, CRIMSON SKIES.

I need this figure (SPEEDING BULLETS is one of my favorite Elsworlds stories); I also need a Moench / Jones BATMAN omnibus - Elseworlds (RED RAIN saga, DARK JOKER), 515-552, all of it.

sun/20220731

I am awash in a post-hyperglycemic crash but dinner was totally worth it; internal overnight blood-machinations doing their thing. Going to try an experiment tonight with the basal insulin - though I'm not sure that it will matter. Probably time I gave up trying and went for the pump – though I'm still not used to having push notifications from my body and reticent to have a mini-pager attached to my person at all times. On the other hand, shifting to a DEUS EX-infused augmentation isn’t exactly unappealing to the gamer in me – "I never asked for this."

Gave up on Prime's so-fucking-boring/such-a-waste-of-talent THE 355 and likewise gave up on finding an interesting brainless movie and watched more BLOWN AWAY season three instead.

Macro0084 inbound.

sat/20220730

The final set of final shifts and edits are locked into place, I think: relief that I've found something of middling acumen with Affinity Publisher over the month of this process unfolding. Makes these sort of last-minute realizations and understandings of what, exactly, I'm writing, more possible / amenable to reality.

Fingers crossed that, once I get this set, having the template will make it all easier. That'd be the dream, anyhow.

These semiannual, handmade releases are how I want to express myself moving forward. The agency inherent is beyond meaningful: the newsletter is how I communicate, PRESS (A) is how I express myself – without it, without building that platform for myself on the shoulders of those who inspired me to get there (Steve, Justin, MJ) I never would have been able to write what I've written in this first one and found the freedom to press forward into whatever iteration of myself lies ahead.

The most useful addition to my desk in ages; Macro0084 tomorrow.