THE GREAT SILENCE (Corbucci, 1968)

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(Watched: sat/20221008 via Blu-Ray. Directed by Sergio Corbucci from a screenplay by Vittoriano Petrill, Mario Amendola, Bruno Corbucci and Sergio Corbucci; starring Jean Louis Trintignant, Klaus Kinski, Vonetta McGee, Frank Wolff and Luigi Pistilli. Released November, 1968.)

While I knew that if Wallace Stroby said it was good (as he did in our March conversation about my favorite film of all time, Leone's ONCE UPON A TIME IN THE WEST) it would be, little did I expect to find myself engrossed in one of the most profound experiences of discovery I've had with a Western since, perhaps, OUATITW.

Snowbound, brutal, and utterly bleak: if Leone's works are singularly operatic love letters to the American Western signed by big kid with action figures, Corbucci's – especially here – are slices of neo-realist pulp (even in a movie about a guy with a gatling gun in a coffin) that dismantle all notions of convention and leave them thumbless across an unsparing landscape. Add Klaus Kinski as a sadistic bounty hunter and you've really got something to behold.

Side note: always a joy to see Frank Wolff (ill-fated in OUATITW as Brett McBain and in life, having committed suicide in 1971, at age 43) and Luigi Pistilli, familar – among other roles – to me as Tuco's monk brother in THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE UGLY.

Adding both a rewatch of Corbucci's DJANGO (saw it years ago) and a first watch of THE SPECIALISTS (the finale of Corbucci's "Mud and Blood" trilogy, with SILENCE being the second film in the unofficial sequence) to the list. Definitely one of those "I wish I could see it again for the first time" experiences.

NL by weekend / WEREWOLF BY NIGHT

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Which is far less sexy-sounding than Vampire Weekend (whatever happened to them anyhow? loved their stuff) but is nonetheless essential: managed to scrounge out more words than I expected and, via writing about them, brought my two-fold plans for taking a creative gamble on myself (ComicsThing and Another Thing) into sharper focus. On track to arrive in subscribers’ inboxes tomorrow morning.

WEREWOLF BY NIGHT is the best thing Marvel has done in a long time (though SHE-HULK is brilliant, as was WANDAVISION) and I want more of it. Always great to see a composer direct (though I can't think of any off the top of my head – I'm not including myself in it; I'd rather include those possessed of talent in both): they bring such a unique sense of timing to things.

something i wrote while i was writing something else

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There's a story Tom Petty told that I'm fond of telling myself and anyone within earshot, of when he and the Heartbreakers were recording what, IMO, is their greatest and most underappreciated album (1999's ECHO; might write a thing about it), and in the middle of recording one song, Petty stopped them, and said "I wrote a better song" while they were recording so they moved on and recorded this new song which was, indeed, spectacular (Track five, "Swingin'").

Anyhow: how it relates: I had written a whole thing about career / life plateaus and how I couldn't figure my way out of it but ended up figuring at least something to help me through it so I stopped writing the former piece, wrote and sent the email, and am now writing this to tell you / myself that I did just that.

And also an excuse to write about Tom Petty which I need to do more of.

zilchery->something(s)else

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Reached the point where the totality of my creative zilchness this morning was something to behold, the suffocating fear that ComicsThing is all for naught – a typical manifestation, especially when I'm about to take a leap into something worthwhile –, the reminders of perpetual creative heartbreak, a general feeling of stagnation, of GROUNDHOG DAY-ness, of relentless blech.

Solution: switched to Something(s)Else for a couple of days (newsletter will take up the weekend) as I've learned (and remembered) that, as a general rule, my worklength capacity on a single project before needing to switch to something else is about four-five days. Spent about a week straight with ComicsThing, so I was clearly overdue. Both ComicsThing and I could feel it.

Writing PRESS (A) 02 and 03 at the same time (in addition to ComicsThing) and will determine which will move forward as January gets closer; whichever one doesn't make the cut / the deadline will move to 03 – though I'm starting to lean towards these Something(s)Else as 02 with MainFictionThing taking over all of 03: a good left turn, I think, maybe, IDK.

in wave

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Having more or less exorcised the fuckeries of my formative years, I'm in a weird stage of not having that emotional foil (even if I’m the only one of the two of us who knew she was a foil) not knowing what to do without one – like mother, like son, apparently: when her mother died, she made K into her sworn enemy; after she died, I made an attempt to turn K's dad into mine (he did and has made it all too easy) and, while I think I've managed to stop it – though those patterns do, indeed, run deep – or at least put a hard pause on it, I'm nonetheless making efforts at increased vigiliance over myself: "he keeps watch and guard on himself as his own enemy, lying in wait for him," as Epictetus says; we are, all, our own worst enemy.

Something of the start of a midlife crisis, perhaps, or at least a defining reorientation of things. Having well and truly fucked things up during my quarter-life iteration (and baring the scars of being at the center of both of my parents’), I'm operating with one primary rule: no drastic changes until I’m as certain as I can be that I’ve ridden the wave to shore or wherever it throws me off.

appropriating meditative stickings

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Asking myself: what does "slowing down" look like for me? Does it mean stepping away from daily things here (or towards them and away from multiple posts)? Fewer projects? Fewer TSR episodes? Less giveafuck? Definitely the last one – but unsure about the rest of them: every time I say I'm going to stop doing the daily things I end up having something to write about but I’m leaning that way more than I have in awhile. TSR, I need for the balance with my own solo efforts. Fewer projects? I’ve only got three main ones going, not terrible; eh, think I'll stick with less giveafuck and let the chips fall where they may.

Finding that practicing Stone's STICK CONTROL on the practice pad helps get me out of an invasive thoughtloop. Rhythm + counting + focus = a stick-bearing meditation: fascinating / horrifying that the voices of interruption that pop up are all things (Step-He) used to say to me when I practiced / disturbed his sacred existence and that I somehow managed to appropriate into my own internal voice. Explains a lot. Fucker.

Keep playing, keep counting, keep breathing, keep going. And on and on and on.

weary of perpetual briskness

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Heating people coming today to see about extending the vent in the paintshop over to my office. 38ºF outside right now and it's more than a little brisk back here (but hey, the six-by-five-foot window with a crack across it hasn’t completely shattered yet so yay). Made it through more than a few winters back here in my little corner with a little space heaters but I'd like to see if venting from the actual house furnace makes a difference. Other option: a solar-powered heater. Gets plenty of light on the roof, so it's doable.

Relieved that I decided to not let myself check comms because there's nothing there except Dems begging for more money. Idea: every donation you give buys you a week off from receiving their fundraising newsletters. Get on that, ActBlue.