playacting(?)

in

Effort of late being to discern the point at which my work times veer from essential aspect of myself (as my psychology prof wouldve said: breathing, sleeping, eating, shitting) to playacting: while the pre-breakfast part, from about 0445 until 0745 feels like the former, the post–, more often than not, feels like the latter. Question, then: do I stick only with the times when it's an essential aspect of myself, or do I strive to make the playacting feel as essential? Or do I roll with the playacting? Pondering, with no answer in sight, but hey if nothing else that Panama Canal scene in 3 BODY PROBLEM was all kinds of oh my fuck amazing.

Number Cruncher

in

Latest addition to the watch collection, this brilliant Mr Jones Number Cruncher (couldn't resist the red silicon band). I've wanted a jumping hour watch for more than a brief spell, and, not only was this one not insanely expensive (some of the prices for jumping hours are mind-boggling), but it has this glorious kaiju designed by Onorio D’Epario. Will definitely add more MJ watches to the collection - and devour more of D’Epario's work.

mr jones number cruncher watch

internal

in

Felled, by hands competent (read: neither mine nor weather): the longstanding evil chestnut tree at the back of the yard. Far better to bring it down in a controlled manner than the alternative – which, I feared, was becoming more and more likely to happen. Only big change / adjustment being that the little green shed was thrust out of the shade for the first time in 600 years, give or take, and, so I – that we might enter and retrieve various yard implements sans oxygen – had to cut a vent into the thing (read: a lopsided rectangular hole stuffed with chicken wire).

But hey, I got to play with my reciprocating saw.

Continued: a(nother) recalibration of my reasons for continuing my writing practice to being less from the external (career, being heard, etc) to the internal (because I want to – though I probably should have deeper reasons that). Tried social again and I didn't like the thought patterns it dredged up: too much reliance on the external, creation for it, unnecessary pressure. Wasted how many years of my life subjecting myself to that? No, much better to type things up here, post them, and be done.

Note: that you are presently unable to discern deeper internal reasons for continued practice may be the source of the problem. Solution: plumb the depths – or say fuck it and do whatever you want, IDK.